parenting struggles – Naty Matos

If you’ve ever looked at another mother and thought, “Why can’t I keep up like that?”—you are not alone.

Maternal shame is one of the most common, yet least discussed, heavy lifts of parenting. It quietly shapes how we react, how we cope, and how we view ourselves. But there is a massive difference between making a mistake and believing you are the mistake.

Here is a look at how shame sneaks into motherhood, and why healing it changes everything for both you and your child.

Guilt vs. Shame: Knowing the Difference

Guilt says:“I lost my temper. I need to fix that.” (Focuses on behavior)
Shame says:“I’m just a bad mother.” (Focuses on identity)

When we parent from shame, every messy moment feels like proof of failure. Instead of driving positive change, shame triggers emotional withdrawal, overcompensation, or self-attack.

The Illusion of the “Perfect Mother”

Social media serves up a steady stream of spotless homes, organic meals, and serene parenting. But comparing your raw, exhausting days to someone else’s curated highlights creates an impossible standard.

Your child doesn’t need a perfect mother who never makes a mistake. They need a regulated mother—one who can take responsibility, repair the moment, and show them how to recover when life gets messy.

What You’ll Discover in the Full Episode:

Why Motherhood Triggers Childhood Wounds: How your past might be driving your current parenting reactions (and how to break the cycle).
The Power of Repair: Practical scripts to reset with your child after a hard moment without collapsing into self-doubt.
4 Physical Tools to Stop a Shame Spiral: Quick, body-based techniques to regulate your nervous system before you react.
Reparenting Yourself: Simple self-compassion practices that model true emotional resilience for your kids.

You Don’t Have to Parent from Burnout

Real motherhood includes messy rooms, quick meals, lost patience, and days where keeping everyone safe and fed is the ultimate win. That doesn’t mean you’re failing—it means you’re human.

Ready to drop the weight of perfectionism and find your way back to yourself?

👉 [Watch the full video/episode here] to learn how to break free from maternal shame and build a grounded, compassionate connection with your child.

#ParentAppreciationDay isn’t just about celebrating moms and dads in the traditional sense. The truth is, parenting doesn’t always come with a biological tie or a legal document. Families come in all shapes and sizes—and so do parents. Sometimes it’s an aunt, a grandparent, a mentor, a foster parent, or even a neighbor who steps in and shows up. Day after day. Meal after meal. Homework after homework. Cry after cry.

The person who carries the heart of a parent is the one who provides love, guidance, and sacrifice when it’s needed most. That’s what we’re honoring today.

You Don’t Get It—Until You’re In It

As a parent myself, I can tell you—nothing prepares you for the role until you’re living it. No book. No advice. No amount of observation. Parenting reshapes you. It stretches your capacity to love, to give, to protect, and to forgive.

I didn’t truly appreciate my mother until I became a parent. I had my child later in life, just like she had me later in hers. Growing up, I didn’t realize the depth of her sacrifices. She worked night shifts, came home, fed her husband and daughter, and still managed to handle a toddler—me—on little to no sleep.

Now, as I chase after my own toddler after a full night’s rest, I wonder how she did it. The exhaustion is real. But so is the love.

The Protective Lens of a Parent

When I was younger, I used to think my mother was overprotective—always worrying, always guarding. Now I get it. Parenthood awakens a fierce instinct to protect. You begin to see dangers your child can’t. You think ahead. You sacrifice without thinking twice. It’s not paranoia. It’s love through the eyes of responsibility.

“As a mother comforts her child, so will I comfort you…”
— Isaiah 66:13

That protective spirit isn’t weakness or control. It’s the very heartbeat of parenting.

If You’re a Parent Today…

Take a moment to honor the journey. Whether you’re co-parenting, single-parenting, step-parenting, or playing a parental role in someone’s life, you are seen.

If your own parents are still around, tell them thank you. Let them know you now understand some of the weight they carried. Say the words you may not have had before.

If you’re not a parent yet and have held onto resentment or a misunderstanding, perhaps it’s time to look at your parents through a new lens. Parenting is hard. Sometimes, people do the best they can with what they have, and that doesn’t always align with what we need.

Forgiveness isn’t always about them. It’s about freeing yourself.

To every parent doing the work—seen or unseen, biological or not—we honor you today. Your love, your presence, and your sacrifices matter. You are raising the next generation with courage, and that’s worth celebrating.

“Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the Lord your God is giving you.”
— Exodus 20:12

What If They Were Unhealthy?

Let’s be honest—some parents weren’t safe. Some were absent. Some were deeply broken themselves. And if reconnecting isn’t possible or wise, that’s okay. But if you can, choose to release bitterness. Let God take the pain and replace it with peace.

“Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”
— Ephesians 4:32

You Are Appreciated

If no one has told you today, we at The Rising Muse appreciate you. You are not alone in this journey.

🙏 Have a blessed Parent Appreciation Day. 🙌

🎧 Want to hear more real talk and inspiration? Tune in to our podcast, The Rising Muse, where we dive into the heart of parenting, healing, and purpose. Available wherever you listen to podcasts.